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Saturday, August 20, 2005

After Sending My Short Film To Tokyo, I Suffer From Painful Post-Creativity Depression.

Post-creativity depression is a painful feeling. You feel empty and depressed because you've finally completed something you've been working on for ages. I had this feeling when I finished the first version of Forced Labour almost four months ago. And that lasted for almost a week.



I've just sent Forced Labour to the Con-Can Internet Film Festival, and I'm already starting to feel the first few effects of post-creativity depression. Sweet November starring Keanu Reeves and Charlize Theron is playing on TV right now, and it's a pretty depressing movie, thus it's not helping things much. (and it's not THAT bad a movie, despite Keanu's wooden acting)

Post-creativity depression is kinda similar to post-RPG depression (the feeling of emptiness you get when you've finished a RPG. Usually, I would start a RPG immediately after I've completed one to diminish this horrible feeling, and it does work). Strangely, I seldom feel depressed after finishing a written work, perhaps because I usually spend less time and effort in writing compared to filmmaking.

Back when I was writing fanfics, I tend to churn out one work after another that I don't have to suffer any of these. When I committed myself to finish 'Slam Dunk: Inside Stuff' for nearly three years, finishing it gave me a feeling of relief and excitement. Relief because it was long overdue, excitement because I was looking forward to my future personal projects.

'Forced Labour' is a much different case. I started working on it since February, and THOUGHT that it ended on May, but it stayed with me, continuously 'telling' me that it's not over, and that there's a much better film within the rough cut version I did. And thus I reworked the entire short film, cutting it down to a third of its original length, changed the entire mood (less hard rock, more jazzy and funky), tone (less humour, more serious) and storyline (a backstory is developed for a main character, hence the new flashback scenes filmed).

Now that it's all done, all I can do is seek film festivals and competitions to send this to. I'm not sure whether it'll be selected by any of them, all I can do is keep my fingers crossed. What future film projects do I have? I haven't decide on that yet. Writing projects? Undecided either. I need some time to calm down, readjust, I need to get over this. Can't let this mourning period last for long. For now, just have a look at two screenshots from the film.

Image hosted by Photobucket.com


Image hosted by Photobucket.com

UPDATED: 14th of January 2013

FORCED LABOUR never got into CON-CAN Internet Film Festival. In fact, it never got into any film festivals at all. Almost 7 years have passed since I made it, and what I learned back then had been invaluable. The feeling of having a group of people willing to help me indulge in my lifelong dream of becoming a filmmaker is something I cannot explain nor describe.

In 2009, with a few more filmmaking experiences, I would end up winning the Grand Prix at the CON-CAN Internet Film Festival with a short film called FLEETING IMAGES. But this would never have happened if I never made FORCED LABOUR before that, with all my supportive friends.